I read my LiveJournal earlier to help with writing a non-fiction flash piece and as I read my entries, I asked myself:
- Why was I such an emofucktard?
- How did any woman fuck me despite this glaring disability?
Since first grade, I’ve chased after women, after the concept of love and soulmates, written terrible poems, made poor life choices because I thought this person I was supposed to be with was the ‘one’. I ignored red flags like pathological lying and emotional abuse with this belief that love conquers all; not really. My own fickle nature didn’t help in most of these relationships. The divorce made me better. Therapy gave me clarity.
I will cop to some moments of emotional cowardice. I haven’t handled my exits well, allowing others to make that decision because I’m too timid, too scared to say ‘it’s time for you to leave’, to say ‘y’know, I really don’t want children’. I’ve also been guilty of placing unrealistic expectations on relationships. Recognizing all of these things, I stopped doing them and helped in my current relationship, which has gone pretty well. It’s a shame it’s taken me about 17 years of dating to finally get something right.
I finished my Jesus Christ, Boy Detective novelette/novella and revised the hell out of it last night. I am letting it sit for a little before I go back and do a little more revising before unleashing it without remorse upon the world.
Speaking of Jesus Christ, Boy Detective, my JCBD story “The Early Bird Gets The Shaft” is in the latest issue of Whole Beast Rag. The issue is a murderer’s row of brilliance. Check it out for free right here.
Three of my Porn for the Blind poems are live on the latest issue of Linden Avenue. Check them out here.
Finally, I am delivering a talk on how to get published in literary journals at the next Pecha Kucha night in Orlando. Click here for more details about the show.
Finally, make sure you follow me on my Tumblr.