I’m really good at being charming and witty and that helps me sell myself to women quite well. However, I’m not really good at being charming and witty enough for people to buy my books in the quantities I would like people to buy my books.

It’s hard to think of yourself as “product” when you’re a creator of some kind but you really are “the product”. Everything that you say or do contributes to your image, your marketability as “the product”, whether you are aware of it or not.

The neat trick here is walking that fine line between producing well and selling well without being an obnoxious, Mametesque dick about being a salesperson when selling your wares. Some in the indie lit community (such as xTx and Roxane Gay), have quietly cultivated a portfolio that is compelling enough for her product to fly off the shelf. I’ve taken that approach and it has led to some really awesome opportunities, including the honor of writing the introduction to the latest issue of Kill Author but the extra revenue stream has been a little thin.

I’m not expecting to make a killing off my writing in its current state but it would be nice if I could compel people to buy more of my product (legally). Once I write my Twilight and sell it and get movie rights, then I’ll expect a killing and live like Daniel Plainview in his twilight years.

In short, you should buy this to start. And then this. And while you’re at it, this. I also have some paper copies left of The Serial Rapist Sitting Behind You is a Robot. Get with me directly to get your copy.

Finally, my latest Sex Laws column is up here. I can always use more of your sex/dating questions, for real.

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About J. Bradley

J. Bradley's is a Best of the Net and Pushcart Prize nominated writer whose work has appeared in numerous literary journals including decomP, Hobart, and Prairie Schooner. He was the Interviews Editor of PANK, the Flash Fiction Editor of NAP, and the Web Editor of Monkeybicycle. He is the author of the poetry collection Dodging Traffic (Ampersand Books, 2009), the novella Bodies Made of Smoke (HOUSEFIRE, 2012), and the graphic poetry collection The Bones of Us (YesYes Books, 2014), illustrated by Adam Scott Mazer. He is the curator of the Central Florida reading series There Will Be Words and lives at iheartfailure.net.

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